Lost…Finding Me!

Work is like a battlezone…or shall I say, like a box of chocolates? Hmmmm the latter seems more appropriate as I LOVE CHOCOLATES! I Love my Job, I am passionate about doctoring people.
What I mean is, full of surprises, not knowing what is awaiting us next, and often bitter…(but with a hidden sweet after effect in God’s good time? The last I am not too sure of).

But the problem is all the hoolabaloo…the hanky-panky…the people who rob me of my peace of mind! Of course I can choose NOT to give others the power to rob my mind of its peace – but when it affects me, and surprises (not the sweet kind) jumps out of random corners, pouncing of us just when everything seems calm and smooth…Frustrating is an understatement. Fear of the unknown, and lack of ‘guts’ is making me stay put.

Can I afford to change location…or direction again? Time is ticking away…I need to ‘achieve’ something! (Is this a high achiever syndrome? Never contented with milestones reached – but always feel this pit-stop doesn’t really mean anything. But then truly, I am in the middle of the sea…believing I have a shore to land on, but wondering if the shore I see faraway will just move further away as I approach it, as it is nothing but a mirage?”

***

Why did Forrest Gump run? Just because he felt so.

Why did I walk this evening? Just because I felt so.

I left clinic 10 minutes earlier, instead of wasting my time waiting for patients that would never come, for me, anymore… Thus, I gained some extra daylight time for myself – Just for MYSELF, in the outdoors! 😀

wpid-wp-1432033190430.jpeg

My walk had its fair share of enchantements along the trail too…:D

*

At first my ankles started hurting after walking less than a kilometre – The first steps are the hardest…get started, and the rest will be a piece of cake. GET STARTED! Ignore the pain, and it will soon go away

Indeed, as I picked up on my pace, the soreness of my ankles disappeared! 😀
I walked and walked, and would have continued walking, if not for nightfall – There will come a time for Rest, and moderation in everything.

I came across a boy who felt lost, asking for directions – So am I…and I am seeking help from people vying to reach the same shore I’ve set my eyes on.

He didn’t take my advice, but thought he can find his way – My internal compass knows the direction, but sometimes I just Feel Lost. Like this phase of life? 


Sometimes we might think we are lost…but the compass pointing us in the Right direction is inbuilt – WITHIN US. 

Just like the answers to many a great Questions in Life.

I chose medicine to serve…thus, Serve I Shall.

*

What an irony that as a child, we thought adults had it all figured out…here I am turning 33 in less than half a year, and feeling clueless – I was more confident of ‘future’ & ‘vision’ & ‘life plan’ as a child than I am today!

I do count my Blessings for what I have…but I need to FIND Myself, Within me! The driven child that I was…

A thousand steps journey begins with a single step…May I Never Stop Walking. Amen

God Bless Me! _/\_

***

On an unrelated matter, it is very good to know that my ‘Pay It Forward’ facebook challenge participants have started receiving their surprises…thanks to Amma who helped me send them out.

A card, with handwritted spur-of-the-moment Poem

Looking for Direction? Serves as a reminder to me…to Stop and Look at the Signages 😉

Well well…Life didn’t come with an instruction, but He gave it to us with a promise…

MAY I ALWAYS HOLD ON TO FAITH! Which is often dwindling…of late.

*

Come to think of it, the last I had my peace of mind fully intact for a full month, was when I was focused on clearing the exam…just this March.

Thus, the True Challenge is to live one day at a time…One Moment in Time…To Live in The Present – for my Peace of Mind!

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